Our Policy

(The Fine Print No One Reads)
👀 📝 🍪

What We Collect 🕵️‍♂️

  • • Your hopes and dreams and hopfully your money 😁(Just kidding... huh)
  • • Every cookie you've ever eaten 🍪 (Okay, just the digital ones)

How We Protect It 🛡️

We guard your data like a dragon guards its treasure... but less fire-breathing.

⚠️ Reality Check: No system is 100% secure, but we scaffoled all the identity files 🤝.
💀 If something happened : Blame Microsoft .

Third-Party Sharing 🤝

We don't sell your data because:

  1. That's unethical 👎
  2. We're too busy fixing bugs 🐞
  3. Our lawyer said no ⚖️

Our Refund Policy (or lack thereof)

Important Notice

All sales are final. No refunds will be issued under any circumstances.

☕
Fika Clause

No refunds - not even for fika emergencies!

⚔️
Viking Statute

Refunds? Vikings didn't get refunds either!

❄️
Winter Amendment

Our policy is colder than a Swedish winter

Last Updated: Never | Version: ♾️♾️